KOSTILYOFF. Why should I choke you? What would be the use? God be with you – live and prosper! But I’ll have to raise you half a ruble – I’ll buy oil for the ikon lamp, and my offering will atone for my sins, and for yours as well. You don’t think much of your sins – not much! Oh, Andrushka, you’re a wicked man! Your wife is dying because of your wickedness – no one loves you, no one respects you – your work is squeaky, jarring on every one.

KLESHTCH [shouts] What do you come here for – just to annoy me?

[Satine grunts loudly.]

KOSTILYOFF [with a start] God, what a noise!

[The Actor enters.]

THE ACTOR. I’ve put her down in the hall and wrapped her up.

KOSTILYOFF. You’re a kindly fellow. That’s good. Some day you’ll be rewarded for it.

THE ACTOR. When?

KOSTILYOFF. In the Beyond, little brother – there all our deeds will be reckoned up.

THE ACTOR. Suppose you reward me right now?

KOSTILYOFF. How can I do that?

THE ACTOR. Wipe out half my debt.

KOSTILYOFF. He-ho! You’re always jesting, darling – always poking fun.. can kindliness of heart be repaid with gold? Kindliness – it’s above all other qualities. But your debt to me – remains a debt. And so you’ll have to pay me back. You ought to be kind to me, an old man, without seeking for reward!

THE ACTOR. You’re a swindler, old man! [Goes into kitchen]

[Kleshtch rises and goes into the hall.]

KOSTILYOFF [to Satine] See that squeaker – ? He ran away – he doesn’t like me!

SATINE. Does anybody like you besides the Devil?

KOSTILYOFF [laughing] Oh – you’re so quarrelsome! But I like you all – I understand you all, my unfortunate down-trodden, useless brethren.. [Suddenly, rapidly] Is Vaska home?

SATINE. See for yourself —

KOSTILYOFF [goes to the door and knocks] Vaska!

[The Actor appears at the kitchen door, chewing something.]

PEPEL. Who is it?

KOSTILYOFF. It’s I – I, Vaska!

PEPEL. What do you want?

KOSTILYOFF [stepping aside] Open!

SATINE [without looking at Kostilyoff] He’ll open – and she’s there —

[The Actor makes a grimace.]

KOSTILYOFF [in a low, anxious tone] Eh? Who’s there? What?

SATINE. Speaking to me?

KOSTILYOFF. What did you say?

SATINE. Oh – nothing – I was just talking to myself —

KOSTILYOFF. Take care, brother. Don’t carry your joking too far! [Knocks loudly at door] Vassily!

PEPEL [opening door] Well? What are you disturbing me for?

KOSTILYOFF [peering into room] I – you see —

PEPEL. Did you bring the money?

KOSTILYOFF. I’ve something to tell you —

PEPEL. Did you bring the money?

KOSTILYOFF. What money? Wait —

PEPEL. Why – the seven rubles for the watch – well?

KOSTILYOFF. What watch, Vaska? Oh, you —

PEPEL. Look here. Yesterday, before witnesses, I sold you a watch for ten rubles, you gave me three – now let me have the other seven. What are you blinking for? You hang around here – you disturb people – and don’t seem to know yourself what you’re after.

KOSTILYOFF. Sh-sh! Don’t be angry, Vaska. The watch – it is —

SATINE. Stolen!

KOSTILYOFF [sternly] I do not accept stolen goods – how can you imagine —

PEPEL [taking him by the shoulder] What did you disturb me for? What do you want?

KOSTILYOFF. I don’t want – anything. I’ll go – if you’re in such a state —

PEPEL. Be off, and bring the money!

KOSTILYOFF. What ruffians! I – I – [Exit]

THE ACTOR. What a farce!

SATINE. That’s fine – I like it.

PEPEL. What did he come here for?

SATINE [laughing] Don’t you understand? He’s looking for his wife. Why don’t you beat him up once and for all, Vaska?

PEPEL. Why should I let such trash interfere with my life?

SATINE. Show some brains! And then you can marry Vassilisa – and become our boss —

PEPEL. Heavenly bliss! And you’d smash up my household and, because I’m a soft-hearted fool, you’ll drink up everything I possess. [Sits on a bunk] Old devil – woke me up – I was having such a pleasant dream. I dreamed I was fishing – and I caught an enormous trout – such a trout as you only see in dreams! I was playing him – and I was so afraid the line would snap. I had just got out the gaff – and I thought to myself – in a moment —

SATINE. It wasn’t a trout, it was Vassilisa —

THE ACTOR. He caught Vassilisa a long time ago.

PEPEL [angrily] You can all go to the devil – and Vassilisa with you —

[Kleshtch comes from the hall.]

KLESHTCH. Devilishly cold!

THE ACTOR. Why didn’t you bring Anna back? She’ll freeze, out there —

KLESHTCH. Natasha took her into the kitchen —

THE ACTOR. The old man will kick her out —

KLESHTCH [sitting down to his work] Well – Natasha will bring her in here —

SATINE. Vassily – give me five kopecks!

THE ACTOR [to Satine] Oh, you – always five kopecks – Vassya – give us twenty kopecks —

PEPEL. I’d better give it to them now before they ask for a ruble. Here you are!

SATINE. Gibraltar! There are no kindlier people in the world than thieves!

KLESHTCH [morosely] They earn their money easily – they don’t work —

SATINE. Many earn it easily, but not many part with it so easily. Work? Make work pleasant – and maybe I’ll work too. Yes – maybe. When work’s a pleasure, life’s, too. When it’s toil, then life is a drudge. [To the Actor] You, Sardanapalus! Come on!

THE ACTOR. Let’s go, Nebuchadnezzar! I’ll get as drunk as forty thousand topers!

[They leave.]

PEPEL [yawning] Well, how’s your wife?

KLESHTCH. It seems as if soon – [Pause.]

PEPEL. Now I look at you – seems to me all that filing and scraping of yours is useless.

KLESHTCH. Well – what else can I do?

PEPEL. Nothing.

KLESHTCH. How can I live?

PEPEL. People manage, somehow.

KLESHTCH. Them? Call them people? Muck and dregs – that’s what they are! I’m a workman – I’m ashamed even to look at them. I’ve slaved since I was a child… D’you think I shan’t be able to tear myself away from here? I’ll crawl out of here, even if I have to leave my skin behind – but crawl out I will! Just wait.. my wife’ll die.. I’ve lived here six months, and it seems like six years.

PEPEL. Nobody here’s any worse off than you.. say what you like.

KLESHTCH. No worse is right. They’ve neither honor nor conscience.

PEPEL [indifferently] What good does it do – honor or conscience? Can you get them on their feet instead of on their uppers – through honor and conscience? Honor and conscience are needed only by those who have power and energy.

BUBNOFF [coming back] Oh – I’m frozen.

PEPEL. Bubnoff! Got a conscience?

BUBNOFF. What? A conscience?

PEPEL. Exactly!

BUBNOFF. What do I need a conscience for? I’m not rich.

PEPEL. Just what I said: honor and conscience are for the rich – right! And Kleshtch is upbraiding us because we haven’t any!

BUBNOFF. Why – did he want to borrow some of it?

PEPEL. No – he has plenty of his own.

BUBNOFF. Oh – are you selling it? You won’t sell much around here. But if you had some old boxes, I’d buy them – on credit.

PEPEL [didactically] You’re a jackass, Andrushka! On the subject of conscience you ought to hear Satine – or the Baron.

KLESHTCH. I’ve nothing to talk to them about!

PEPEL. They have more brains than you – even if they’re drunkards.

BUBNOFF. He who can be drunk and wise at the same time is doubly blessed.

PEPEL. Satine says every man expects his neighbor to have a conscience, but – you see – it isn’t to any one’s advantage to have one – that’s a fact.

[Natasha enters, followed by Luka who carries a stick in his hand, a bundle on his back, a kettle and a teapot slung from his belt.]

LUKA. How are you, honest folks?

PEPEL [twisting his mustache] Aha – Natasha!

BUBNOFF [to Luka] I was honest – up to spring before last.

NATASHA. Here’s a new lodger.

LUKA. Oh, it’s all the same to me. Crooks – I don’t mind them, either. For my part there’s no bad flea – they’re all black – and they all jump – .. Well, dearie, show me where I can stow myself.

NATASHA [pointing to kitchen door] Go in there, grand-dad.

LUKA. Thanks, girlie! One place is like another – as long as an old fellow keeps warm, he keeps happy.

PEPEL. What an amusing old codger you brought in, Natasha!

NATASHA. A hanged sight more interesting than you!.. Andrei, your wife’s in the kitchen with us – come and fetch her after a while.

KLESHTCH. All right – I will.

NATASHA. And be a little more kind to her – you know she won’t last much longer.

KLESHTCH. I know.

NATASHA. Knowing won’t do any good – it’s terrible – dying – don’t you understand?

PEPEL. Well – look at me – I’m not afraid.

NATASHA. Oh – you’re a wonder, aren’t you?

BUBNOFF [whistling] Oh – this thread’s rotten.

PEPEL. Honestly, I’m not afraid! I’m ready to die right now. Knife me to the heart – and I’ll die without making a sound.. even gladly – from such a pure hand.

NATASHA [going out] Spin that yarn for some one else!

BUBNOFF. Oh – that thread is rotten – rotten —

NATASHA [at hallway door] Don’t forget your wife, Andrei!

KLESHTCH. All right.

PEPEL. She’s a wonderful girl!

BUBNOFF. She’s all right.

PEPEL. What makes her so curt with me? Anyway – she’ll come to no good here.

BUBNOFF. Through you – sure!

PEPEL. Why through me? I feel sorry for her.

BUBNOFF. As the wolf for the lamb!

PEPEL. You lie! I feel very sorry for her.. very.. very sorry! She has a tough life here – I can see that.

KLESHTCH. Just wait till Vassilisa catches you talking to her!

BUBNOFF. Vassilisa? She won’t give up so easily what belongs to her – she’s a cruel woman!

PEPEL [stretching himself on the bunk] You two prophets can go to hell!

KLESHTCH. Just wait – you’ll see!

LUKA [singing in the kitchen] “In the dark of the night the way is black.”

KLESHTCH. Another one who yelps!

PEPEL. It’s dreary! Why do I feel so dreary? You live – and everything seems all right. But suddenly a cold chill goes through you – and then everything gets dreary.

BUBNOFF. Dreary? Hm-hm —

PEPEL. Yes – yes —

LUKA [sings] “The way is black.”

PEPEL. Old fellow! Hey there!

LUKA [looking from kitchen door] You call me?

PEPEL. Yes. Don’t sing!

LUKA [coming in] You don’t like it?

PEPEL. When people sing well I like it —

LUKA. In other words – I don’t sing well?

PEPEL. Evidently!

LUKA. Well, well – and I thought I sang well. That’s always the way: a man imagines there’s one thing he can do well, and suddenly he finds out that other people don’t think so.

PEPEL [laughs] That’s right.

BUBNOFF. First you say you feel dreary – and then you laugh!

PEPEL. None of your business, raven!

LUKA. Who do they say feels dreary?

PEPEL. I do.

[The Baron enters.]

LUKA. Well, well – out there in the kitchen there’s a girl reading and crying! That’s so! Her eyes are wet with tears.. I say to her: “What’s the matter, darling?” And she says: “It’s so sad!” “What’s so sad?” say I. “The book!” says she. – And that’s how people spend their time. Just because they’re bored.

THE BARON. She’s a fool!

PEPEL. Have you had tea, Baron?

THE BARON. Yes. Go on!

PEPEL. Well – want me to open a bottle?

THE BARON. Of course. Go on!

PEPEL. Drop on all fours, and bark like a dog!

THE BARON. Fool! What’s the matter with you? Are you drunk?

PEPEL. Go on – bark a little! It’ll amuse me. You’re an aristocrat. You didn’t even consider us human formerly, did you?

THE BARON. Go on!

PEPEL. Well – and now I am making you bark like a dog – and you will bark, won’t you?

THE BARON. All right. I will. You jackass! What pleasure can you derive from it since I myself know that I have sunk almost lower than you. You should have made me drop on all fours in the days when I was still above you.

BUBNOFF. That’s right.

LUKA. I say so, too!

BUBNOFF. What’s over, is over. Remain only trivialities. We know no class distinctions here. We’ve shed all pride and self-respect. Blood and bone – man – just plain man – that’s what we are!

LUKA. In other words, we’re all equal.. and you, friend, were you really a Baron?

THE BARON. Who are you? A ghost?

LUKA [laughing] I’ve seen counts and princes in my day – this is the first time I meet a baron – and one who’s decaying – at that!

PEPEL [laughing] Baron, I blush for you!

THE BARON. It’s time you knew better, Vassily.

LUKA. Hey-hey – I look at you, brothers – the life you’re leading.

BUBNOFF. Such a life! As soon as the sun rises, our voices rise, too – in quarrels!

THE BARON. We’ve all seen better days – yes! I used to wake up in the morning and drink my coffee in bed – coffee – with cream! Yes —

LUKA. And yet we’re all human beings. Pretend all you want to, put on all the airs you wish, but man you were born, and man you must die. And as I watch I see that the wiser people get, the busier they get – and though from bad to worse, they still strive to improve – stubbornly —

THE BARON. Who are you, old fellow? Where do you come from?

LUKA. I?

THE BARON. Are you a tramp?

LUKA. We’re all of us tramps – why – I’ve heard said that the very earth we walk on is nothing but a tramp in the universe.

THE BARON [severely] Perhaps. But have you a passport?

LUKA [after a short pause] And what are you – a police inspector?

PEPEL [delighted] You scored, old fellow! Well, Barosha, you got it this time!

BUBNOFF. Yes – our little aristocrat got his!

THE BARON [embarrassed] What’s the matter? I was only joking, old man. Why, brother, I haven’t a passport, either.

BUBNOFF. You lie!

THE BARON. Oh – well – I have some sort of papers – but they have no value —

LUKA. They’re papers just the same – and no papers are any good —

PEPEL. Baron – come on to the saloon with me —

THE BARON. I’m ready. Good-bye, old man – you old scamp —

LUKA. Maybe I am one, brother —

PEPEL [near doorway] Come on – come on!

[Leaves, Baron following him quickly.]

LUKA. Was he really once a Baron?

BUBNOFF. Who knows? A gentleman – ? Yes. That much he’s even now. Occasionally it sticks out. He never got rid of the habit.

LUKA. Nobility is like small-pox. A man may get over it – but it leaves marks.

BUBNOFF. He’s all right all the same – occasionally he kicks – as he did about your passport.

[Alyoshka comes in, slightly drunk, with a concertina in his hand, whistling.]

ALYOSHKA. Hey there, lodgers!

BUBNOFF. What are you yelling for?

ALYOSHKA. Excuse me – I beg your pardon! I’m a well-bred man —

BUBNOFF. On a spree again?

ALYOSHKA. Right you are! A moment ago Medyakin, the precinct captain, threw me out of the police station and said: “Look here – I don’t want as much as a smell of you to stay in the streets – d’you hear?” I’m a man of principles, and the boss croaks at me – and what’s a boss anyway – pah! – it’s all bosh – the boss is a drunkard. I don’t make any demands on life. I want nothing – that’s all. Offer me one ruble, offer me twenty – it doesn’t affect me. [Nastya comes from the kitchen] Offer me a million – I won’t take it! And to think that I, a respectable man, should be ordered about by a pal of mine – and he a drunkard! I won’t have it – I won’t!

[Nastya stands in the doorway, shaking her head at Alyoshka.]

LUKA [good-naturedly] Well, boy, you’re a bit confused —

BUBNOFF. Aren’t men fools!

ALYOSHKA [stretches out on the floor] Here, eat me up alive – and I don’t want anything. I’m a desperate man. Show me one better! Why am I worse than others? There! Medyakin said: “If you show yourself on the streets I smash your face!” And yet I shall go out – I’ll go – and stretch out in the middle of the street – let them choke me – I don’t want a thing!

NASTYA. Poor fellow – only a boy – and he’s already putting on such airs —

ALYOSHKA [kneeling before her] Lady! Mademoiselle! Parlez français – ? Prix courrant? I’m on a spree —

NASTYA [in a loud whisper] Vassilisa!

VASSILISA [opens door quickly; to Alyoshka